;_; I’m so sorry. I’ll bump up the Patreon pledge again once I’m not broke any more. Shouldn’t be too long.

No! Spend money on yourself man! Stop that! You give enough! <3
I just need to get my shit together and do more work. I might have a job on the way that might make things better for me soon enough.

Don’t worry. :) I’m just venting.

matsuoka-lin

darkslover:

On my first watch, I had wondered why Rin had started to talk about his hardships in Australia to Haruka. Yes, I knew that it would come up eventually, but why did he start when he started?

Then it hit me. He consoled Haruka about his inevitable separation with Makoto, an issue…

shameless-fujoshi
  • Miyano: Since we're done with voicing the series [at this point], I want you to forget [the aftermath] for a bit and tell us about how you felt acting that scene in episode 11. There hadn't been a moment before where Haruka's emotions exploded like that [in the argument scene between Makoto and Haruka]. How was it? Were you nervous?
  • Shimazaki: I WAS nervous! I was anxious about showing Haruka's character [the right way] and worried about how he would appear to everyone. Throughout the ENTIRE second season, Haruka is worried and lost about his future and what he'll do…
  • Miyano: The worrying protagonist (trope).
  • Shimazaki: Yeah. I actually really like those, when someone in their youth is worrying about the changes that lie ahead. Rin always appeared bright to Haruka since the first episode. When [Rin] decided right away [in childhood] on what he wanted to do and when he said he would make the best team, he looked sparkling-- but [Haruka] himself didn't have that. Of course, [Haruka] wants to swim for his team, but when it came to his future, he didn't have anything. A normal high school kid, at least in my experience, doesn't decide that clearly on what they want for their future.
  • Miyano: Yeah, not everyone is like that.
  • Shimazaki: They could go to university and stretch out their feelers on what they'd like to do there. But for Haruka [because of his skill], he is at that moment, being pressured to decide. So I could understand why he would feel lost. As Haruka, I felt that he's the kind who is very sensitive of others emotions and takes that in [whether he wants to or not]… so he feels very sensitively the expectations and wishes of everyone and the unknown scouts around him-- and he's unable to let that slide off of him. It makes him feel even more down and uncertain. When Haruka acts based on his emotions, that's when things go well for him, I guess is the way to say. Through his emotions he gets stronger [emotionally]; he's firm about what he likes, what he dislikes, and about his desire to swim. But since his future got involved this time, he went by what he thought instead, using logic and stuff that he normally doesn't think with [rather than what he instinctively felt], so he got stuck for longer than he should have. As I'm sure you've already seen in episode 12-- no matter how much he worried, if he'd just thought "I want to swim"… it wouldn't have been the answer to everything, but it would have helped a great deal for him on an emotional level in feeling that his future was free to pursue. But because he went with logic instead, it made him feel more and more dejected. That was the flow of the story in episode 11, but in episode 9 he also blew up at Rin, right? So in that situation where everyone is coming down at him about deciding his future, here comes his Iwatobi friends who didn't really speak to him that much about it. First, there's Nagisa and Rei, who told him how they felt about it kindly, in a gentleman-like way. And Haruka isn't able to push them away about it because he loves them, he understands how they're feeling, and he knows that they're being nice about it. But because he doesn't understand [what to do], he says as much and he runs away. Then, here comes the last stronghold, Makoto. In the scene before it, there was one where [Haruka] is on edge because they're talking about what they'll do after graduation, and Makoto reads the atmosphere and says normal everyday things like "Why don't we go to the festival?" to help Haruka to relax. So [Haruka] feels grateful to Makoto about that, but since Makoto wants to talk about his own future too, he gets upset again. To me, Makoto was really the last stronghold. [Makoto] doesn't push [Haruka] or force him into something, and [Makoto] stays by his side while he's worrying about his future like this. He kind of stagnates with him, and you think there could be a bit of dependency involved, but now this last stronghold comes to tell him to not run away. That's why it shook Haruka really hard.
  • Miyano: He must have felt really pained by it.
  • Shimazaki: When he said "Not you too!" his expression was one of deep anguish.
  • Miyano: Despite what [Haruka] said, you could tell [from that scene] that he relied on Makoto a great deal… But since he's thinking a great deal and feeling confused about his future while being shown all these different paths by other people, Haruka must have felt that he wanted to change, right?
  • Shimazaki: Yes!
  • Miyano: If he really didn't care [about changing] and he liked the way he was now, then it wouldn't affect him at all. Since he feels confused about it, though, he must be feeling deep inside that he wants to do something about himself, or feels that he must. But since that's a different style from his usual, he doesn't know why he feels irritated but he can't help feeling irritated.
  • Shimazaki: Yes.
  • Miyano: If he really didn't feel anything, he could just keep on swimming. But when that staircase [to move ahead to his future] was prepared for him, he did take a proper moment to think about whether he wanted to climb it or not.
  • Shimazaki: Yes.
  • Miyano: So in the end, he takes that first step up towards adulthood…
  • Shimazaki: Why do you make that sound so chic?
  • Miyano: ROFL.
  • Shimazaki: No, sorry for interrupting, we're on a serious subject.
  • Miyano: So, in the end, he's able to feel that he does indeed have something fierce inside himself. That made me very happy to see, even as the audience.
  • Shimazaki: Yes. When [Haruka] first felt that Rin was a bright presence, that's what it was. In his nightmare, he sees Rin holding his hand out while this huge light shines from behind him. So, him thinking that Rin is bright is him thinking that the world [that Rin is in] is a bright one.
  • Miyano: Yeah, maybe somewhere in his heart he wanted to be in that world too, but when he realized that, he still thought "That's not cool" or "That's not true." So [not being honest with himself] is what keeps things from getting better for him.
  • Shimazaki: Yes.
  • Miyano: But by facing it… or rather, by having friends who make him face it… Within this Free! group, each person lived each moment of real life with value and they each shown through with great charm.
  • Shimazaki: It was very human-like drama, especially seeing Haruka being confused about his life and running away from it. Humans aren't like a book, they come with all sorts of contradicting emotions.